Monday, February 11, 2013

Feeling Feelings

Saturday night as I was driving home, Jason Isbell's song Dress Blues came on my ipod. I heard this song for the first time in 2007 when Jason first started touring on his own after leaving the Drive-By Truckers. It's a song about a friend of his who was a Marine, went overseas, and didn't come back. That first time I heard it I stood in the middle of the 40 Watt in Athens, GA, and sobbed. I've cried every time I've heard the song since then. I even skip it sometimes because I don't want to go into work/the gym/etc with a tear stained face. Every time I listen to it, I think, "surely this time I'll make it through without crying." And every time I don't. This past Saturday, my aunt and uncle celebrated their 50th wedding anniversary a couple of months early, because my uncle isn't expected to live to see the actual date. And as I was driving home, listening to the song, I thought, "you know, I never want to be the kind of person who doesn't cry listening to this song." I don't want to be the kind of person who can hear about someone dying and not cry just a little. I never want my heart to be so hard that I don't feel things deeply. Life is short. Tell someone you love them. Spend a little extra time talking to your parents or your best friend or some stranger. Live life full of feelings. It's the only way to live.